11 Things You Should Never Say At Work
What you say matters. Whether you're voicing an idea during a meeting or
making an offhand comment at lunch, everything you say adds to your overall
character.
In the new book "Executive Presence: The
Missing Link Between Merit and Success," Sylvia Ann Hewlett says three things signal
whether a professional is leadership material: how they act, how they look,
and how they speak.
Speaking eloquently not only improves
your daily communications, it builds up your overall persona and executive
presence. "Every verbal encounter is a vital opportunity to create and
nurture a positive impression," Hewlett writes.
Some phrases instantly undermine your
authority and professionalism, and should be banned from the office. Here are
11 things you should never say at work:
1. "Does
that make sense?"
Instead of making sure you're
understood, asking this tells the listener that you don't fully understand the
idea yourself, career coach Tara Sophia Mohr told Refinery 29. Instead, she suggests asking,
"What are your thoughts?"
2. "It's
not fair."
Simply complaining about an injustice
isn't going to change the situation. "Whether it's a troubling issue at
work or a serious problem for the planet, the point in avoiding this phrase is
to be proactive about the issues versus complaining, or worse, passively
whining," Darlene Price, author of "Well Said! Presentations
and Conversations That Get Results" told Forbes.
3. "I
haven't had time."
"More often than not, this is
simply not true," said Atle Skalleberg in a LinkedIn post. Whether you didn't make time for the
task or forgot about it, Skalleberg suggests giving a time when it will be done
instead of explaining why it's late.
4.
"Just"
Adding "just" as a filler
word in sentences, such as saying "I just want to check if..." or
"I just think that..." may seem harmless, but it can detract from
what you're saying. "We insert justs because we're worried about coming on
too strong," says Mohr, "but they make the speaker sound defensive, a
little whiny, and tentative." Leave them out, and you'll speak with more
authority.
5. "But I
sent it in an email a week ago."
If someone doesn't get back to you,
it's your job to follow up, says Skalleberg. Be proactive when communicating
instead of letting the other person take the blame.
6. "I
hate..." or "It's so annoying when..."
Insults have no place in the office,
especially when directed at a specific person or company practice. "Not
only does it reveal juvenile school-yard immaturity, it's language that is
liable and fire-able," says Price.
7.
"That's not my responsibility."
Even if it's not your specific duty,
stepping up to help shows that you're a team player and willing to go the extra
mile. "At the end of the day, we're all responsible," Skalleberg
says.
8. "You
should have..."
"Chances are, these fault-finding
words inflict feelings of blame and finger-pointing," Price says. She
suggests using a positive approach instead, such as saying, "In the
future, I recommend..."
9. "I may
be wrong, but..."
Price calls this kind of language
"discounting," meaning that it immediately reduces the impact of
whatever you're about to say. "Eliminate any prefacing phrase that demeans
the importance of who you are or lessens the significance of what you
contribute," she says.
10.
"Sorry, but..."
This implies that you're automatically
being annoying. "Don't apologize for taking up space, or for having
something to say," says Mohr.
11.
"Actually..."
Prefacing sentences
with this word, as in, "Actually, it's right over there," or
"Actually, you can do it this way," puts distance between you and the
listener by hinting that they were somehow wrong, according to Carolyn
Kopprasch, chief happiness officer at Buffer. Rephrase to create a more positive
sentiment.
9 Tips for Conflict Management at the Workplace
Organizational conflicts arise when there is a disharmony between employees and managers or between managers and outside forces. People vary in their ideology and perceptions; react to situations in different ways. This causes emotional clashes resulting in conflicts. Though it has some positive effects such as developing new ideas for resolution but more often it has a negative impact on the welfare of the organization.
In any organization, it is the managers who have the responsibility of handling conflicts and they need to find creative solutions for this.
Here are some factors that managers need to keep in mind for successfully resolving a conflict.
1. Do not avoid conflict: As mentioned in Steven Covey’s 7 habits, Habit 3: Put first things first. Thus effective managers should intervene whenever a conflict comes their way. An unresolved conflict may trigger the growth of another conflict.
2. Do not meet concerned people separately: This may lead to a polarizing effect among members; both parties stick to their own point of view without coming to a resolution. Thus a manager should use his persuasive skills and bring both parties to a common platform in order to resolve the issue.
3. Make both parties share their concerns: An effective manager with his leadership skills will engage in conversation with both parties, allow them to share their viewpoints and suggest specific actions, which are acceptable to all concerned. An effective manager needs to explore ways to arrive at a win-win situation for everyone.
4. Communicate the message properly to avoid any misunderstanding: Communication barriers amongst employees and employers create a wide gap in their understanding. If not monitored properly, this may lead to mistrust amongst the employees. Wrong information also evokes fear in the minds of employees. Thus it is important to communicate through proper channels in a clear and concise manner so as to minimize ambiguity.
5. Take a proactive stance when required: Managers must be able to identify any potential conflict likely to cause problems and take decisions to ensure that they are diffused right at the beginning. With sound reasoning ability, a manager should try to influence both the parties agree to his terms. Create an environment where in the employees have faith in the management and are reassured that their interests will be well-guarded.
6. Make sure that employees are aware of their own responsibility: An effective manager should delegate work amongst the various employees and make them aware of their own job responsibilities.
7. Build cordial relationships with employees: Foster a sense of belonging among members. It is important for a manager to keep the enthusiasm of employee high keeping at bay all negative thoughts.
8. Conduct meetings with all employees: Conducting meetings increases the transparency on organizational issues. An effective manager discusses plans for the upcoming period and shares a status report showing the accomplishments achieved so far. This gives a vivid picture to the employees.
9. Have a “suggestion box” for employees: It is one of the powerful means in which a manager can collect “honest” feedback from employees, especially in conflict situations.
Conflict and negotiation go hand in hand. With growing complexity in the business environment, small issues pertaining to employees often go unnoticed by the top management. If ignored for a long period, this may take the shape of conflict. Thus the onus is upon the manager to diffuse any potential conflict-causing situations right at the beginning.
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